Look, we see you. You’re an hour into work on a Wednesday, you used all your allotted vacation days by the end of February, and it feels like the week will never end. Or maybe you were asked to be in the wedding party of someone you’re in love with and you can’t stand the thought of doing a reading from Corinthians in front of a hundred people with a broken heart. Or maybe you’re supposed to be defending your thesis on William Faulkner in fifteen minutes but you never bothered to actually read The Sound and the Fury, or Absalom! Absalom!, or, well, any of Faulkner’s books. Either way, we’ve got the fix you need.
Enter Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes Skiving Snackboxes. The instructions are simple: eat one end of these candy chews and you’ll instantly begin suffering an urgent affliction like vomiting, fainting, or a nosebleed. Once you’ve excused yourself from whatever odious obligation you were trying to escape, just eat the other half of the chew and you’ll be good as new, allowing you to laugh at the idea of doing anything you don’t want to.
Though our Silver Spork Snackbox recipes aren’t quite strong enough yet to induce sudden bouts of puking, we still love making these multi-flavored chews. We’re gonna show you how to make Fever Fudge (cayenne pepper makes you heat up, vanilla brings the flames back down), but you can visit She Creates Stuff to learn how to make Puking Patilles, Fainting Fancies, and Nosebleed Nougat as well.
3 cups white chocolate chips
1 can sweetened condensed milk (14 ounces)
1 teaspoon cinnamon
½ teaspoon cayenne pepper (for low-grade fever) or 1 teaspoon (for hospital wing heat)
½ teaspoon vanilla or mint extract (depending how frosty you want to get)
Red food coloring
Blue food coloring
Parchment paper or foil
Line your pan with foil or parchment paper. Grease the foil and/or uncovered areas around the parchment. Set pan aside.
Place your white chocolate chips in a medium microwave safe bowl. Pour sweetened condensed milk over the chips. Microwave the mixture at 30 second intervals, stirring in between until the chips are thoroughly melted and the sweetened condensed milk is incorporated.
Pour approximately half of the molten fudge into another microwave-safe bowl and set aside. This will become the cooling end of your fever fudge.
To the first bowl of melted fudge, add cinnamon, desired amount of cayenne pepper, and red food coloring. Stir to blend in the color and add more until desired shade is reached. Adjust the amount of cayenne pepper, testing as you go, until you get the desired heat level.
Pour red, spicy fudge into the loaf pan and spread it out evenly. Tap the pan on the counter to level the top and release air bubbles. Refrigerate until set.
One the red fudge has set, warm the uncolored half of the fudge by microwaving and stirring as before, until the fudge is runny. Add ½ teaspoon vanilla or mint extract and some blue food coloring. Stir until the food coloring is mixed in and has reached desired shade.
Pour the blue fudge over the red and chill until set. The heat from the warm blue fudge should be enough to fuse the colors together at the joint.
Once fully set, remove the set fudge from the pan. Trim the fudge to make nice squared-off edges. Slice into long strips and lay these two-toned strips on their sides, cutting the candy into even pieces. You now have Fever Fudge! Just be sure to test it out on a first year before you try it.
Post by Bailey James. Photos and Recipe by She Creates Stuff.